The Shared Wife

She was her father's unwanted daughter. Her father wanted a son and she was born as a twin. He refused to take her as his own but the sages were adamant that she was a gift from sun god Agni. She knew from the beginning she was there for a purpose. A thirst for revenge was built by her father over the emperor's clan. She knew what followed was a difficult journey from Panchala to the Capital of the empire to fulfil what he desired. She had always loved the Warrior Prince all her life but fate had something else in mind. She was the shared wife of the Pandavas.

In the Palace...
She sat in the biggest room of the Inner Chambers. She was happy. The whole of Indraprastha was buzzing with news of the Warrior Prince coming back home in the next few days. His Banwas (Living in the forest for a decided period) was over. She will see him after years of separation and her joy knew no bounds. She was getting ready like the day she became his bride. She was excited by the thought of seeing him. A guard came in with a letter. He read it out loud and her hopes died. He has let her down. Yet again. He has broken the one promise he had made through the marriage. His loyalty.
" Krishna,
I am writing this to inform you that Parth has run away with Subhadra and has married her with my consent against Balaram Dada ji and Dwarka Nagari's wishes. As a friend, I found it important to let you know of this union before they arrive at Indraprastha."
The message from Vasudeva was devastating. She ordered her maids to leave her alone. She threw away her Churamani in anger. She tore away her letter. The world seemed to laugh at her. A shared wife. Only her husband's enemies have taunted her. But now? She also doubted. Can I expect no loyalty just because you people made me a shared wife? I did not want this. Her tears would not stop all night. Her husbands did not dare go into her chambers. They knew her feelings of being let down were inconsolable.
The sun rose at dawn and she picked herself up. She wiped away her tears and with a straight face opened her chamber doors and stepped out. Her worried maids were ready for her orders there. " I want to go to the temples, get a chariot ready!"
The King walked up to her and asked hesitantly " Panchali, are you all right? Is there something I can do for you?" She looked at her kindest Husband with hurt eyes. " Yes, Arya. Prepare a welcome for the new bride. I will come back from the temples in time to welcome Vasudeva's sister and.... her husband."
" He is not only her husband Panchali. Maybe brother Arjun had no option..." He tried to reason with his angry wife. The family feud was the last thing he wanted inside the Pandavas' Household. She knew what he thought.
" Don't worry Arya, Subhadra will not be blamed." She walked away. Her anger was with her husband, not his wife.
At the Shambhu Temple, she sat hands in pranam silently. An hour passed by in her trail of thoughts as the guard came in and announced " Maharani, you are summoned to the Palace, Prince Arjun has returned with his wife." Her heart skipped a beat. The moment has arrived.
An aarti thali in hand she stood at the doorway ever smiling. After all, being sad at your husband's arrival with his new bride was apshagun (bad omen). Subhadra in bridal wear all decked up came down from the chariot helped by Arjun. She looked nervous. She had always called Draupadi "Jiji" (elder sister). She was expecting a disappointed look in the eyes of the Queen. She had taken away the person she loved the most. She would be devastated. Subhadra had no choice. If she hadn't run with her love her brother would have married her to Suyodhan (Duryodhan). To her joy, the Queen stood with a warm smile. Life had taught her to smile at it. Arjun went to hug his brothers. Draupadi resisted eye contact as she welcomed them and took the bride to her new chambers.
" Jiji, I want to tell you what happened. Please don't blame Arya. Actually, he wanted to tell you before we..."
" Subhadra, you must be tired. Rest today, we will talk tomorrow. Madhav has written to me. I know everything." She walked away from this awkward conversation.
On her way back to her own chambers she found him waiting for her in the hallway. He was searching her eyes for forgiveness. Forgive me Panchali for letting you down. The warrior could not say anything he meant to. Draupadi looked at him with a weary smile and said " Go to the chambers Arya, your bride is waiting." As she walked past him carefully avoiding body contact he turned back and said " Panchali...."
"What Arya?"
" Weren't you waiting for me too?"
" Not anymore..." Her voice choked as she fought away tears. He knew how much she.... yet...
Her voice became cold as stone as she replied " I was praying you come home safe Arya and you have, now please go to your Chambers, Subhadra is waiting. And the king is waiting for me..."
The last words were intended. He knew that. This is not the first time she has blamed him for sharing her with his brothers. He watched her walk away. Dejected he made his way into his chambers to be with his new bride.
The doors of his chamber closed making Draupadi turn back and look as her eyes filled with tears. She ordered the nearest guard " Tell the King that I am unwell and do not expect visitors at my chambers tonight" She went inside her dark chambers. Darkness surrounded her life. She closed the Chamber doors for the night. Until light arrives again.

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